what if childbirth is just the pain of the 9 periods you missed
and all this time i thought it was the baby ripping through your vagina
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ⓖⓔⓝⓓⓔⓡ ⓠⓤⓔⓔⓡ 〓
Ich spreche ein bisschen Deutsch ∴
an ɑstɹonɑut in soul and mind ⇧⃝
➲ Amazing boy from the lovely country of Mexico. Artist. Attendee of Charles Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters. Would-be Companion to a raggedy man. Brandon Sullivan’s personal cheering section. Bubblegum Hugh Dancy is precious. Eat the Rude. ⦾ lovehlove
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in my english class we have to fill in this chart and say how many hours we’ve been on the computer or watching tv and say what we’re doing and why and my friend looked at me and said “you should probably lie a little.”
I may have reblogged this recently but holy shit the noise it makes when he slaps the bowl out of his hand fucking kills me.
"If Bertolt is in the party, Reiner’s Defense and Attack Power increases by 60%."
Canon on both sides now I’m so glad.
"If Reiner is in the party, Bertolt’s Defense Power becomes 1.7 times normal."
Dear lord, Bertl, your stats are insane.
I just noticed something, as if the stat bonuses weren’t gay enough…
Reiner’s Defense Stat is Bertl’s height in centimeters (192) and Bertl’s Attack Stat is Reiner’s weight in pounds (210).
homo 60% up
when I was six I threw a tantrum because I wanted a slushie from 711 and I remember my dad said “I will never buy you a slushie” AND LITERALLY RIGHT NOW HE CAME IN THE CAR WITH A SLUSHIE AND I WAS LIKE WHY DIDNT YOU GET ME ONE AND HE LOOKED ME DEAD IN THE EYE AND SAID “REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE SIX”
I love pirates because they have no concept on albeism. oh you have no leg? here have a peg leg. no hand?? well guess we gotta put a hook on that, give those sons of bitches a surprise. Blind in one eye, put an eyepatch on no one fucking cares, youre deaf??? go man the canons you glorious bastard.They dont care if youre disabled bcus as long as you can fuck shit up they literally dont fucking care.
*applies mascara to leg hair* yes, much more definition and volume
Bank teller laughing at robber.
She like wtf this nigga gon do wit that lmao
this is why i have trust issues